As 2024 comes to a close, people look back to assess their life and contemplate what can be done in 2025 to achieve a more fulfilling existence. In doing so, you may notice a conundrum: Why is it that you have some great things in your life—perhaps a fulfilling career, a loving family, a cozy home—but these things seem to only have a limited impact on your daily happiness?
At the same time there may be not-so-great things around us—cracks in a relationship, rudeness online, inefficiencies at the workplace—and it seems we often get used to these maladies, so we are less likely to try and change them.
In other words, we stop noticing what was always there. Here’s how you can change that.
Recognize Habituation
Habituation is a fundamental characteristic of our brain—a tendency to respond less and less to things that are constant or frequent.
Imagine walking into a coffee shop. At first the aroma of freshly brewed coffee is salient, but after about 20 minutes, you can no longer smell it. Your olfactory neurons stop responding—they habituate. And just as you become accustomed to the scent of coffee, you may also become used to more complex aspects of your life.
The challenge then is to regain sensitivity, both to the great things in life, so we can feel the joy, and to the terrible things we stopped noticing that we could potentially change if we try. So, how do we dishabituate?
Break Up the Good
The answer lies in this wonderful quote by the economist Tibor Scitovsky: “Pleasure results from incomplete and intermittent satisfaction of desires.”
Consider a song you like—would you enjoy it more if you listened to it continuously from beginning to end, or with short breaks? Ninety-nine percent of people say “no” to breaks. However, research shows that people enjoy a song more when they listen to it with breaks. Why? If you listen to a song continually, the joy it elicits at the beginning dwindles over time. Breaks, however, induce dishabituation, so every time the song comes back on, the level of joy bounces back up.
To combat habituation and maximize pleasure we need to consume the good things in life a little at a time. Whether it is a Netflix show, a chocolate cake, or a new romance—savor, rather than binge.
Swallow the Bad Whole
On the other hand, if you need to complete an unpleasant task—household chores, admin work—complete them in one go. Research shows that people suffer less if they must listen to an unpleasant noise (like the sound of a hoover) continually than if they take breaks. If you experience the noise continually, the “pain” it elicits at the beginning dwindles over time. Breaks, however, induce dishabituation, so every time the noise comes back on, the level of suffering bounces back up.
Experiments in Living
What about the aspects of your life you suspect may be inducing stress and anxiety, but you cannot really tell how much they are affecting you because they are always there, so you do not attempt to change them? They loom in the background like the constant noise of an AC—you don’t realize how much of a negative impact the noise has until someone turns it off and suddenly you feel much better.
Consider social media: Is it impacting you negatively? In one study, researchers paid half of the participants $100 each to quit a social media platform for a month, while the other half went on with life as usual. At the end of the experiment, the “quit” cohort were happier and less stressed. Most importantly, they were surprised. They did not realize how negative an impact the platform had on them.
In 2025, experiment in living. Eliminate some elements from your daily routine for a while, one at a time, and add some other new ones. Measure and assess the impact on your life, so that you can keep those features that induce happiness and purpose, and eliminate those that do not.
